We continued in this way for almost three months – I would spend a half hour before any meeting with my arms wrapped around her hips, holding her up off her chair and letting her thrust and buck against my mouth as I slowly licked and tongued her out of her mind. I was in heaven – a gorgeous, sexy, wonderful woman was almost dependent on me for pleasure. I was fairly sure I was her only source of orgasm at this point – from her reactions to my touches, I don't think she was pleasuring herself at all anymore. If she hadn't had a meeting in a couple of weeks, she would often come within only a minute or two.
However, the emotional quandary continued. I wondered whether I had feelings for this woman – and if I did, what I should do about it. If I tried to change our arrangement into a romantic relationship, I risked losing everything. I was fairly sure that the dichotomy between our relationship and our physical intimacy was getting to Diane as well – whenever I would slip into her office, she would look at me with a mix of anticipation, desire, and an odd sort of confusion, as if she was not sure how she should emotionally react to my presence anymore.
Eventually, the question was answered for me. We reached a tipping point one afternoon. Diane had a meeting scheduled over dinner with not one, but two clients, and I slipped into her office almost a full hour before Diane had to leave for the restaurant. She seemed surprised to see me that early, but she turned her chair nonetheless and willingly surrendered her pussy to me. I loved the first sigh she gave when my mouth touched her. It was a sigh of pleasure, of relief, and of a satisfied anticipation, as if she really did look forward to these sessions.
This time, though, I had decided, I was going to take my time. I deliberately avoided her clit – no matter how much her hips reached for me or how much she tried to twist herself to get contact there, I kept from touching it, running my tongue over her lips, sucking and nibbling at them, and then swirling my tongue around her opening without entering, tantalizing her. After almost fifteen minutes of this exquisite torture, she actually surrendered to it, letting her body relax and just enjoy the gentle, restrained caresses of my mouth. I used my whole mouth, my lips and tongue and even my teeth, lightly nipping at sensitive flesh, teasing her until she was just breathing deeply and shaking ever so slightly, all of her willpower going into not pleading with me to pleasure her more directly.
I dipped the tip of my tongue into her ever so slightly, and heard her catch her breath. Then I withdrew, swirling around her opening, and dipped in again without warning, again barely entering. Another little gasping breath, her hips quivering. I waited a long moment until I felt her hips lift, and then licked her opening firmly, not entering, and felt her jerk, a tiny whimper escaping her. I looked up at her face – her head was lolled back, her mouth open, her eyes shut, her body totally relaxed other than her somewhat tense hips. I smiled, swirling my tongue around her a few more times to hear her gasp, and then, in one long, slow, firm thrust, buried my tongue inside her, wiggling and squirming it against her inner walls.
I drew my tongue out at that, looking up in surprise and eagerness, and swirled my tongue a few more times, lashing it against her opening, tapping sensitive little crevices here and there, until I heard that tiny little whimper again. Then I plunged my tongue as deeply as I could, swirling it inside her.
I almost moaned at the exclamation from her, and found the sound so wonderful after all the months of listening to her silence that I pulled my tongue out again, hearing her whimper immediately in protest. I proceeded then to tease her unmercifully for five full minutes, caressing her outer lips with my tongue and lips, stroking the hood of her clit with my upper lip but never her clit itself, my tongue tantalizingly circling her opening time after time. To my delight, though, her body stayed relaxed, letting me keep control. Finally, I fluttered my tongue at her entrance, drew another whimper from her, and then, lifting her hips slightly, sank it deeper than ever into her body, my lips caressing her slit from top to bottom as I filled her with my tongue.
"Oh, Jessie..." She moaned out.
This time, I did moan. Everyone in my life called me Jess or Jessica. I hadn't been Jessie to anyone since kindergarten. To hear a real endearment on her lips...I had to hear it again.
My tongue teased, darted, swirled – and then lashed her clit, lightly but continuously, driving her almost up out of her chair.
"Oh, my god," she moaned. I slid my tongue down her slit and inside her again. She moaned.
I was like a child with a toy – I did anything that I could think of to make her moan again and again for me, and even though sometimes I sensed her trying to hold them in, she seemed to have surrendered too deeply to stop herself. I started taking her toward her delayed orgasm, fluttering my tongue intermittently on her clit, in between slow, searching thrusts inside her. I made the touches lighter and lighter, almost not touching her at all, feeling her hips rise into the air, and then fastened my mouth to her, sucking deep but gentle on her clit, lashing it with my tongue.
"Oh! Oh, god...oh, god, Jessie..." Her exclamation trailed off into a long, shuddering silence, and then an outright squeal as she climaxed deeply, flooding my mouth with her sweetness. She would have bucked right out of my arms if I hadn't been holding her tightly.
"Oh, Diane," I whispered into her pussy as she relaxed – so softly that I don't think she could hear me. I massaged her trembling hips and thighs as she slumped, splayed open and totally limp in her chair.
We definitely seemed to have passed some sort of barrier after she first moaned my name. We both apparently realized that, whatever the complicated emotional underpinning, what we were doing was extremely pleasurable, and didn't seem to be harming either of us. When we worked, we were as we always had been – friendly and professional. When I was between her legs...now, she voiced her pleasure, if with restraint, moaning and whimpering, occasionally squealing when I did something she especially liked. Her moans of my name – especially the diminutive form of it that I loved to hear from her lips – were still rare and precious when I earned them.
Much of the time, Diane would lie back in her chair with her free leg over my shoulder and her other leg up on her desk, and I would take my time pleasuring her while slowly running my hands over her legs and her hips as much as I liked – which was a lot. She loved when I massaged her feet with my hands while I massaged her clit with my tongue. She squealed the first time I cupped her ass and let her thrust herself to orgasm on my tongue entirely on her own.
She definitely was giving in to the entire process in other ways, too. More and more often I would arrive for one of our sessions only to find her panties already gone, or would feel her press her leg against my hand or arch her hips to my touch without my having to guide her. She would signal me with her sounds when she wanted something – if I was teasing her too much, or she wanted contact somewhere else, she would guide me with whimpers or movements of her body.
On one rare occasion when she needed me to work on a Saturday because of a meeting she was having at a local church picnic, of all things, she actually wore a dress to the office – the first time I had seen her in anything but a skirt and blouse. This, of course, provided me an incredible opportunity. With her dress up around her waist, her creamy hips and thighs totally bare to my hands and her body laid back comfortably, I took the opportunity to explore not only her flat stomach – and much enjoyed feeling the quivers and tension in the muscles there – but slid my hands up higher, and for the first time, touched her breasts. They were soft and silky smooth, and their weight felt perfect in my hands.
The first time I touched them, she gasped, arching against my hands, but her hips pulled back with a hint of nervousness. I almost laughed at the idea of a woman who had my tongue buried inside her being nervous about me touching her breasts. I drew my hands back, exploring her torso, and my tongue soon encouraged her to writhe against my hands. I returned to her breasts, gently massaging them, and, already close, she arched, whimpering loudly. When I tugged softly at her nipples, it was enough to push her over the edge, and I luxuriated in the feel of her nearly bare body bucking under my hands.
Now, we had found entirely new territory to explore. Within a few more sessions, even in her usual blouse and skirt, Diane would be laying with her blouse open, her bra and panties gone, and her body exposed to my ceaseless caresses, giving her body entirely over to me to drive to higher and higher pleasure.
All along this path we were treading, though, I never once suggested or at all hinted that I wished her to return the favor – indeed, we both seemed to shy away from any possibility of that ever happening. I dressed conservatively to work, and she made sure that her body did not brush mine in any way that might be taken as a returned caress. Both of us seemed fearful to cross that boundary, knowing that if she ever returned the pleasure I had given her, we would be lovers in truth.
Even now, I am not sure why I feared that so – perhaps even the threat of losing such a lovely, albeit incomplete, relationship was enough. Perhaps it was something else. I doubt I'll ever know.
It was inevitable, I suppose, that despite our enjoyment of our "arrangement", something would interfere and finally give our emotions a real chance to complicate things.
I sat at my desk, typing out a series of memos and emails to different people on my daily contact sheet. Diane's last meeting had been a few days ago. We had become a great team – with my help, she had been dominating meetings even more than usual, and the firm had picked up so much business that we were seriously contemplating expanding the firm entirely – though Diane had seemed hesitant to expand, since she really didn't need to work the ridiculous hours that most lawyers do.
Firing off another email, I glanced at my inbox and saw that another email had just arrived – one from an address I didn't recognize. Opening it with a frown, I saw a long series of short messages – apparently, I had been accidentally included on an email string. This happens frequently in any office, of course, so I went indifferently to delete it, but then a single word in one of the replies caught my eye – my name.
Unable to help myself, I scrolled curiously back through the chain of messages.
- I received your quote for the renovations. Can you refer me to a legal employment agency to fill out my staff?
That message was from Diane. The next was from an address I didn't recognize, but was signed with a name I did recognize – the owner and operator of the building in which Diane's offices were located. Apparently, Diane had inquired about the costs of expanding our firm, complete with office renovations and new staff.
- Easily – the firm in the offices above yours just completed their renovations, and hired some new staff. They mentioned that they were very happy with their new staff – I've used the same staffing agency myself. They can supply all the paralegals you might need, and a truly qualified legal assistant.
I stopped in surprise, glaring a bit at the message. What did he mean, "truly qualified"? I was fine at my job, and Diane had certainly never complained. Far from it, I thought with a tiny smirk.
- It would be nice to have some of my own paralegals, for a change – sharing them can get pretty annoying. I'll definitely need some help finding at least one assistant who actually knows her stuff – the last two I've had in here had terrible recommendations, and the most recent one couldn't type her way out of a paper bag.
I stopped again – this time, in shocked dismay. I couldn't believe that Diane would really think that about me. She had always seemed pleased with my work, and had complimented me several times – she even seemed grateful to have an assistant she could work well with.
My almost nerveless hand hit the delete button, and the offending email vanished instantly. I shivered, staring blankly at the screen. How could she think...how could she fake all that? Why?
Some part of me, the logical part, maybe, thought that it might be a misunderstanding. Maybe she meant the girl before me – from what I'd heard, she hadn't lasted long.
Of course, I couldn't deny that the law was no specialty of mine. I had picked up bits and pieces, certainly, but I had no formal training or education in legal matters. Law school had never been a financially viable option for me.
I slumped in my chair. Maybe Diane did need a real legal assistant. After all, if she were going to expand her practice, she'd need a full staff, maybe even a partner or two, and assistants who could offer their own legal insights, not just a glorified secretary like me.
I worked for the rest of the day in something like a dream, going mechanically through the motions of my emails and memos, copying down meeting minutes, barely paying attention to what I was doing. I made sure to leave before Diane finished for the night so that I wouldn't have to speak to her, not trusting myself.
Half of me felt as though what was happening was only inevitable – good things usually came to an abrupt end before they should, in my experience. The other half felt angry. I found myself questioning everything that had happened. I wondered whether Diane had ever even really liked me, or if had just tolerated me. Whether she truly enjoyed what I had been doing to her, or whether she had just used me.
That night, though, as I climbed into bed, I could not stop the fantasies returning to me. As my fingers began to tease along my slit, I could not help but imagine the heaven I had found again and again with her, with the taste of her, the sound of her ecstasy and the feel of her skin on my face and mouth while I savored her. I writhed under my hand, and reached my first climax quickly, gasping and shaking. I lay still, eyes closed, Diane's beauty in my eyes and her moans in my ears.
Then I recalled the words I had read, and my anger returned. The memory of her soft, pleasured moans returned – but now the sounds were harsh, cynical, somehow soured. That delicious surrender in her body as she relaxed each time beneath my questing tongue turned into something else – something accompanied by a smug laugh, the sense of getting something that one wants, not a true desirous surrender.
I bit my lip, my anger increasing until I was nearly in tears – and I found my fingers moving again, this time fast and hard, almost grinding into my sensitive skin. The pleasure came in waves, harsh jolts up my spine and through my stomach, tightening it until it nearly burned. I grimaced, digging two fingers into myself. Instead of savoring the memories, I cursed at them now, glowering at the image of my boss that floated before my confused mind.
For a few brief moments, I hated her. Hated this confusion, this sick fear that was choking me.
"Damn you, Diane!" I gasped, growling as I arched up off my bed with my second orgasm, this one hard and sharp, wrenching my spine and causing my legs to spasm so hard that they immediately began to cramp. I curled up immediately on my bed in a fetal position, the pain mingling with my still-fading pleasure.
Finally, I relaxed, the cramps dying out and my breathing returning to normal.
It was so frustrating – I wanted to be angry. I wanted to be furious, to storm into her office and quit – or even show her what I knew about the law. Maybe trap her in some kind of situation where I could sue her, make her pay for this pain I was feeling.
I wanted so badly just to give over to that fear and anger.
But I couldn't. I couldn't hate her. I know now, of course, why I couldn't hate her – some people can hate someone they're in love with, but I'm just not built that way. I didn't realize that at the time, though. The bizarre arrangement, the strange story of our relationship had walled my feelings off deep inside myself and hidden them under layers of fear, self-delusion – and an honest wish not to hurt Diane, or make her life more complex or difficult than it needed to be.
At almost any other time in my life, I would have probably just quit my job and drained my savings account on therapy trying to figure out how I had botched things so badly. This time, though, I couldn't just walk away. I'd stick around long enough to find out what Diane had meant. If she didn't want me around, then so be it.
"Jessica, could you come in here?"
I looked up, and for the first time, I didn't just get up and go in. "What's going on?" I called back.
There was a brief pause. "I need to prepare for my three o'clock."
I glanced at my clock. Barely two. "Now?" I asked.
"Now?" She sounded surprised. "Um, yes, now."
I bit my lip. I almost said no – I swear, I almost said it. I didn't, though, of course. I couldn't help myself. "Coming," I called back.
In her office, I closed the door, and looked at her, my heart twisting all over again at those beautiful cold blue eyes staring across the desk at me, though they seemed surprised and concerned at the moment.
"Is something wrong, Jessica?" Diane asked.
I opened my mouth to shout at her – but, again, of course, I didn't. "No, nothing's wrong."
"Good," she said slowly, still looking concerned.
I knew there was still an hour before the meeting, but I knew that I wouldn't be able to pleasure her for that long the way I felt now...I'd break in two from sheer emotional trauma. I resolved to make it quick – to just get her off and be done with it. Some part of me tried to be clinical, calm, and indifferent. Do it fast, I told myself flatly. Get her to come and she'll leave you alone.
I stepped around her desk, and she turned to meet me. I saw the slight widening of her eyes, the little break in her lips, but my flat thoughts dismissed what I saw. Just lust, I thought. She needs it, no question – that doesn't mean she has any feelings for me. You're just a walking vibrator at this point, I told myself brutally.
I knelt down, slid up her skirt, pulled her panties down – just a bit roughly, I'll admit – and slid my mouth back against her again. She sighed, and I quivered, almost breaking just in that instant, my eyes filling with tears as my lips tasted her sweetness, that tanginess that I so loved, while that anger glittered deep in my mind and other feelings, complicated and frightening, bubbled just underneath, threatening to break free. I knew she wanted me to take my time, but now I didn't want what she wanted. I wanted to hurt her – but I couldn't hurt her. I wouldn't give her what she wanted, though. She'd get what she needed – to come – and that was all.
I ran my tongue firmly over her slit, feeling her twitch in response with a soft whimper, and my tongue softened for a split second, caressing her lips like the petals of a flower, easing them open and sliding within – but my pained heart wouldn't allow me to melt into her again. My tongue hardened, stabbing at her clit almost roughly, and she jerked with a startled gasp, her thighs almost gripping my head as she reacted to my firmness.
I grabbed her legs, my anger heating me, and I took that anger out on her pussy, on the soft, delicious flower that I had worshipped all those times before. I lashed it with my tongue, stabbing and darting my tongue here and there. By now, I knew every weakness in her. I knew where to flutter my tongue to make her jerk, where to stab it to make her gasp, and where to suck her in to drive her over the edge. I made her come brutally fast, with a strangled, startled little squeak, and let her twitch rapidly against my face, my eyes closed and my mouth hard on her soft flesh.
I felt a distant satisfaction – she might have been using me, but at least I could make her come whether she wanted to or not – and leaned away from her, licking my lips furiously, already trying to turn my mind back to the work that waited back at my desk.
Then I couldn't move. Not due to any hesitation on my part, but because her hand was gripping my hair, holding me tight. She arched her back, still breathing fast, and pressed her soft folds back to my lips, rubbing them against my tongue as I opened my mouth in reflex.
"Don't stop," she gasped out, making me freeze in place. "Please, more..." She shuddered, breaking off as my tongue unconsciously touched her, some part of me still as addicted as ever to her taste, her wonderful flavor, the evidence of the pleasure I gave her.
Her fingers gripped my hair firmly, pulling, and I closed my eyes with something like a whimper as my anger imploded, evaporating into a desperate emptiness, with something warm and heavenly gleaming just out of sight. I hesitated, torn between wanting that anger back – that simple, uncomplicated rage – and that heat, that desperate need to taste her, to please her. My tongue stroked her again – this time, warm, soft, and loving, sliding over her opening, dipping into her, grazing her still-sensitive clit.
It was Diane that shattered my resistance this time. "Oh, god, Jessie, more..." she moaned.
I shuddered deeply. My hands, of their own accord, grabbed those creamy smooth hips, and I licked deeper.
"Yes," she breathed, arching, her fingers softening in my hair – but they didn't leave. They rested almost limply on my head, staying gently tangled in my red hair. "Oh, yes," she shuddered, both of her legs sliding over my shoulders, enclosing me in her satiny skin.
My whimper was lost in her soft, wet flesh and her gripping thighs, and my hands slid under her buttocks, cupping her and lifting her greedily to me. My eyes opened, looking up the length of her body. Her head was back, her eyes closed, that little gap between her lips that I had savored so many times. Her free hand reached back to grip the back of her chair as she slid down to half lay in her chair, allowing her to arch higher, her pussy sliding over my tongue until we both moaned.
An image flashed into my over-worked mind – Diane, stretched out naked, on a real bed for once, gripping the headboard and arching helplessly as I drove her to whatever ecstasy I could. Another image flashed in behind it – something else entirely, something I would do if I ever got the opportunity.
"Oh, yes, that's it..."
The images vanished as I recalled what I was doing, my tongue swirling and spiraling in and out of her wetness, and I feasted on her, greedily slurping and sucking at her soft lips, the moist, slick inner flesh, and her creamy nectar flowing freely into my mouth. My tongue drilled deeper still, thrusting desperately. I wanted all of her – I wanted to drive everything but me out of her mind, once and for all.
"Ah...ahh...oh...oh god, what...what..." She cried out as I pulsed my tongue mercilessly in and out of her, fast and deep. I wasn't taking my time or being gentle – she was going to scream for me, and I wasn't going to be used. She was mine, at least for the moment, and I was going to take full advantage.
Her breath turned into short, high-pitched gasps, her hips bucking higher and out of control. She was already close, probably trying to hold back, to prolong this, but I wasn't letting her. My fingers tightened, digging into the firm, silky skin of her buttocks, and my tongue slid out to pull her clit into my mouth. I sucked it lightly once, twice, feeling her jerk each time, hearing her sharp gasps for breath, and then sucked it deeply, my tongue fluttering.
That did it. She cried out, as loudly as I had ever heard her, her hand clenching almost into a fist in my hair. Her mouth gaped open, her breathing momentarily halted. She held there, tense and quivering as I kept up that methodical sucking, not letting her relax, keeping her orgasm riding high, until I felt that spasm in her stomach that warned me that her pleasure would turn to pain very shortly if I didn't stop. I let her relax, though my mouth remained against her. I breathed deep of her scent, her wetness still coating my lips and tongue and chin, my eyes drifting closed as I kept my face buried between her thighs, my hands lightly stroking her still-trembling ass.
Her hand was still limply tangled in my hair, twitching faintly. We stayed that way for a long time. I couldn't bring myself to pull away, and she apparently couldn't summon the energy to move at all.
After several long moments, I opened my eyes, looking up at her only to meet her blue eyes staring back at me.
She looked steadily down at me, her eyes wide and slightly glazed, obviously still dazed by an orgasm of that magnitude.
Our eyes stayed locked for a long moment, and when my mouth moved, it was to apologize, or yell, or ask her just to move her legs, or something – I'm still not sure. It didn't end up mattering. The instant my mouth moved against her, she moaned softly, her eyes staring down into mine widening even more.
I felt my own eyes hood as my desire for her returned with a force that actually shocked me – I had never had a chance to pleasure her while looking into those incredible eyes.
"Jess," she whispered, starting to say something.
No, I thought, that's not my name...not the way I wanted to hear it from her. My lips kissed her pussy with soft, deep warmth, and I breathed her in, not licking, just feeling her, my lips sliding over her slit with the softest of caresses.
She gasped, and her eyes tried to flutter closed, but my fingers suddenly dug into her firm buttocks, causing her eyes to fly open again with surprise. All of my emotion – the remnants of my anger, my lust, my desire, and other feelings I still shied away from – blazed from my eyes into hers, as I mentally begged her to keep her eyes open, to let me look into them. My lips caressed her again, and kept moving, continuously stroking and nibbling and lightly sucking her outer, then inner, lips.
She hissed in a soft breath, her eyes so big. There was a strange light in her eyes as well as we stared each other down. The depth of emotion in her eyes startled me, though they were not emotions I could identify. I did not dare to hope.
I gave her one gentle, curious, tentative lick, a light smooth lick with the flat of my tongue, dragging her outer lips along and wiggling ever so slightly to stimulate her.
She let out a long, sighing moan, and relaxed, her fingers tightening in my hair. "Don't stop," she whispered, not looking away.
And so, with our eyes locked together, I began again. My lips stroked and tasted, my tongue slowly, lingeringly explored.
"Jessie," she breathed, staring into my eyes, unable to look away now.
My own arousal spiked at her use of my name, and my fingers slid higher into the small of her back, warm, smooth and slightly damp from the exertion of her earlier writhing. My fingertips massaged, and she relaxed, sinking even lower in her chair as her legs slid further over my shoulders, tightening to pull me into her. As her shoulders met the seat of her chair her other hand joined the first in my hair, not tugging but just holding my soft locks.
I shuddered, slurping softly at her, watching her lovely eyes and wishing that this moment would never end.
"Ah...mm..." She whimpered.
I gave another slow lick, and she whimpered again, those brilliant blue eyes as round as they could go. My hands slid still higher up her back, massaging her spine. She continued to relax, whimpering and sighing now with every movement of my mouth. Her hips began to rock ever so slightly, sliding her wet, slippery pussy against my mouth.
I began to devour her in earnest, my tongue moving constantly, my lips spreading her open for access. The way she was laying back in her chair was resting more and more of her weight on me, and it forced me to sit back on her floor, stretching my legs out as I held her up against my mouth. The rocking was doing something else as well, though – I was being tantalized by the movement of my legs, rocking along with her body, and my panties tugging and pulling at my already well-lubricated pussy. I whimpered in my own pleasure, but held back my instinct to rock my hips more deliberately.
It wasn't easy – her wet pussy was as delicious as ever, and staring into her eyes while hearing her moans and whimpers of open pleasure, feeling her soft hips pushing against me and her warm thighs trembling on my shoulders – it was all I could do not to start moaning right along with her. I had always been careful about that – I had always known instinctively that there was a line somewhere, and if I crossed it, all this could end.
I managed to put that out of my mind – though the sensations were still there – and concentrated on her, boring my gaze into her while I took my time bringing her to ecstasy. I easily used the rest of the hour, and could have just as easily taken longer. I don't think she would have objected, either, neither of us seemed to blink the entire time, her eyes locked helplessly on mine as I took her body as high as I could, building her up, tantalizing her, until she simply could not hold back any longer.
"Ah! Jessie...Jessie Ahhhahhhhh!" Diane cried out, long and high as my sucking, licking mouth sent her over the edge, and her head arched back, our gaze finally breaking as she was swept under by an intense orgasm. Her hips quivered throughout, and my mouth was filled by her nectar as I carried her all the way through, until she relaxed with a shuddering moan, and her hands fell from my hair to dangle limply beside her.
I shuddered on my own as she relaxed – it had taken all my effort not to join her in orgasm. I realized belatedly that I couldn't move – if I let her hips go, she would fall off her chair. I waited until she shook herself, summoning enough energy to pull herself back up onto her chair by the elbows. Eventually, I was able to sit back, my legs still too rubbery to hold me up. She seemed shaky as well, and now, neither of us could meet the other's eyes.
I glanced up at the clock on her desk, and blinked, flushing slightly. "Um...your meeting's in just a few minutes. I'll let them know you're on your way...I'll just leave you to, um, straighten up." I staggered to my feet, not waiting for her response, and half-stumbled back out to my desk.
That evening, I came back from my umpteenth trip to the copier to find Diane sitting on the edge of my desk. I stopped short in the hallway the moment I saw her, a thousand different things racing through my head, and then I saw the roll of paper she held in one hand. Blueprints.
I heaved a sigh. So she was going to expand her practice, renovate the office...and replace me. I straightened my shoulders, bracing myself, and walked to my desk, joining her.
She smiled at me as I arrived, and I managed a hesitant smile in return. "Jessica," she began, "you remember how we've spoken a few times about expanding our little business here?"
I nodded, not trusting myself to speak. "Our" business indeed, I thought darkly.
"These are the blueprints," she tapped the roll against my desk, "and I'll be on my way out shortly to go over some things with the architect – but I wanted to talk to you first."
I nodded again. "Of course." My voice was a bit flat.
She glanced at me, a tiny frown appearing between her eyebrows as if she had caught my tone. "Jessica, I...I'll be taking on at least one partner – maybe two, depending on...well, it doesn't matter." She looked away. "Obviously, with two or three lawyers, we'll need more support."
She glanced at me again, looking oddly confused. I almost glared at her. Did she expect me to be thrilled at losing my job?
I know, I know – I was being an idiot. Fear does that to all of us.
"We'll be hiring some new assistants," she went on, "and probably a few of our own paralegals." She looked away again. "I thought of having you become an office manager, or something, but I just don't think that would work out. It's just not the way the office will be set up."
I was barely holding in that glare now. "I see."
She didn't look at me this time. "So, the practice will need dedicated legal assistants." She cleared her throat. "We'll be dividing up the clients, probably along thematic lines – different areas of legal practice, and so on. So..." She cleared her throat again, still staring down at my desk.
I idly thought that I had never heard her so inarticulate.
"So, if you wanted to switch to be one of the partner's assistants, you know," she glanced at me, "to keep up with, um, your own interests, I'd understand. I'll give you first choice."
I blinked, my mind trying to follow all that. First choice? First choice of what, now?
She looked at me now, those blue eyes as uncertain as I'd ever seen them. "I mean, I'd like you to stay my assistant – we're, um, so used to each other and all – but I wouldn't want to hold back your career. I know you must not want to be an assistant forever."
For the first time in several minutes – all right, I'll admit it, in several months – my mind actually grasped what was going on. "You...want me...to stay," I stammered, sounding like an idiot.
It was her turn to blink. "Of course," she said, as if it had never been in question. I tried to keep my lower lip from actually hitting the desk. Not only had I realized what was going on, I had realized just how much of an idiot I'd been.
My mind raced. I had three concerns – one, finding a way to say yes that didn't make me sound like a lovesick fool; two, trying to comprehend my luck; and three, trying to recover something resembling dignity. "I think...we work pretty well together," I stammered finally. "I'd like to stay."
She smiled a brilliant smile – a smile that, I noticed dimly, didn't seem like that hard, professional smile I'd seen so many times. "Good. Glad to hear it." She tapped the blueprints on the desk, getting up and walking toward her office. Then she turned back. "Oh, by the way."
My head jerked back up from where I had been staring blankly at the desk, having failed totally to pull my thoughts into anything like coherency. "What?" I blurted out.
"A client was referred to me from London," she explained. "He lives there, even though his business is here, and he deals with a lot of different law firms. He's looking for an advocate to consolidate all of his different legal issues together so that he doesn't have to monitor it all himself." She ran a hand through her hair. "I thought it would be an interesting challenge. I'm heading to London next week to meet with him a few times." Her eyes met mine. "He's paying, so I figured you might like a bit of a vacation too."
"That sounds wonderful," I said immediately, my mind having, for once, not betrayed me. In fact, it was now running in overdrive, having already leapt to an image that I had experienced earlier.
A hotel bed would fit that image just fine.
"All right, I could definitely get used to this," Diane murmured from the next table over. I nodded, sighing in relaxation. The masseuses continued their work, kneading the long flight out of our tired muscles. Both of us were covered with towels, while the pleasant, silent women worked on our shoulders and necks.
Eventually, as they finished, folded up their tables, and left, each of us sat up, wrapping the towels around ourselves, stretching out newly relaxed muscles and testing for any trace of the soreness from sitting in one place for far too many hours.
Diane sighed, looking around the hotel suite – this was mine, since my room had the table and office area around which we would be working while here in London. Diane's room was on a different floor, and since I would be the only one doing much paperwork here, this arrangement had seemed logical. It also fit into my plans perfectly. The massages had been my suggestion.
"What did you think of him?" Diane asked. We had met briefly with the new client right after we landed – he had been waiting at our hotel, eager to meet the consultant who had been glowingly recommended to him. Diane had impressed the man immediately. Personally, I thought he was dull and not quite smart, but I wouldn't have to deal with him much anyway.
"He was...interesting," I murmured politely, tying my towel off and starting to unpack my things as Diane vanished briefly into the bathroom.
She was chuckling when she came out. "Interesting would be being nice."
We exchanged a quick grin.
She chuckled again. "He's dull as dishwater, but it's good business for us, and his enterprises back home are complex enough that keeping it all straight should be interesting – even if he's not."
I laughed, still unpacking, unable to help a glance or two at her long, firm legs, visible beneath her towel. Several images flashed through my head. "Thank you for the massage, by the way," I said then.
"My pleasure," she grinned. "He's picking up the whole tab anyway. We might as well enjoy it."
I nodded, looking away from her as she crossed the room to retrieve her clothes.
"Diane?" I asked softly.
She looked over questioningly.
I looked at her now. "I'm sorry I didn't get a chance to help you...prepare for meeting him."
She blinked. "Oh, um, that's all right, it wasn't really a meeting, he just wanted to introduce himself." Her voice was casual, as if I were referring to preparations like note-taking or copying down bullet points for a presentation.
"Still," I pressed slightly, looking away and shrugging. "If the massage wasn't quite enough, or whatever, you know..." I had decided, through several long, agonizing hours of thought and debate on the plane, to make this attempt. I was deliberately giving her a graceful way out, though.
"That's...a fair point," I heard her say.
I looked over at her. Our eyes met.
"I don't have another meeting today, though," she said then.
I nodded, pursing my lips, making my voice intentionally clinical. "Well, no. I'd be making up for earlier, that's all."
She nodded slowly. "That's true..." She leaned down, massaging one leg slightly. "My legs do still feel a little tense," she admitted.
I tried not to smile at her, keeping that clinical expression. "It's not as though you'd just be..."
"No, no, of course not," she said hurriedly.
"It would just be making up for earlier," I said again.
She nodded even more slowly. "That's right." She started to walk past me, toward the chair, but I stopped her with a hand on her shoulder, turning to face me. Her eyes widened, and I walked her backwards toward the wide bed.
"I think we've been sitting enough today," I murmured softly.
She nodded, sighing with a little smile, the tension broken slightly. "I'll say."
I smiled encouragingly, and she sat on the bed, leaning back onto her elbows.
"That's not going to be all that comfortable," I said quietly, gently lifting her legs onto the bed, subtly pressing her backward, and she wriggled until that pressure stopped – and she was laying right in the middle of the bed, her head and shoulders on the pillows.
"That's better," I sighed, sliding between her legs. I nuzzled my face between her thighs, feeling them part slightly – but the towel prevented them from opening very far.
She seemed to draw away slightly as my fingers found the edge of the towel – but I wasn't stopping. "I can't get my head under here," I murmured reasonably, not looking up at her but just craning my mouth as close to her as I could, breathing warmly on her mound, just out of sight beneath the soft white towel.
Diane shuddered, her legs pressing open, and now she did not fight as I reached up to untie her towel, opening it gently, keeping my eyes on her legs. Everything in my body screamed to look up at her – this was finally my chance to see her completely bare for me – but I wanted her to surrender first.
The moment her soft, trimmed blonde mound came into view, I ran my mouth over it, and she whimpered loudly. I was surprised at how wet she already was – her slit glistened openly, her hips lifting slightly even at that gentle touch. I couldn't help looking up at her with my mouth poised over her. She was watching me. There was open desire in her eyes now, and her nipples were visibly hard.
Then my mind re-focused on that detail, as my eyes wandered downward, drinking in the sight of Diane's beautiful naked body for the first time. Creamy shoulders, high, firm, smooth breasts with tight, dark pink nipples, the tips of her breasts just slightly crinkled around those hard points. Her stomach was almost flat and very smooth. I trailed my gaze down to her bare mound, and trailed my mouth over it again. Her fingers slid into my hair, and I was lost.
I ate Diane slowly, lingeringly, my greedy eyes all over her nakedness as it began to writhe before me. My hands slid up that stomach, feeling the quiver and rhythmic tensing of the muscles beneath her skin, and then filled my hands with her breasts, feeling her arch up to my hands with a gasp. My palms grazed her tight nipples, making her shudder, and then my hands explored them fully, caressing and grazing every curve, my thumbs teasing and toying with those nipples, my hands delighting in finally having complete access to her.
I touched her everywhere – her back, her stomach, her legs. She writhed through one gentle, slow orgasm, and was building to a second when I lightly stroked a fingertip over her slit, lightly teasing the opening as my tongue traced lazy circles around her clit. My eyes watched hers now, testing her reaction.
Her eyes flew open at the first touch, and she looked down at me, her eyes going wide and staying that way. I slurped at her clit slightly, the finger dipping into her, and she bit her lip, whimpering loudly. This time, the whimper was different – lower, more throaty. I loved the sound, and sank my finger in to the second knuckle, hoping to coax it out of her again.
She gasped. "Oh, god." Her involuntary moan was that same throaty sound, and I almost purred. Her hips twisted subtly, and I slid my finger out, letting her watch as I slowly sucked it into my mouth, tasting her, then eased my slippery finger back inside her, exploring a pussy that so far, I had only tasted. My finger gently probed and teased at her inner walls, feeling their slick, spongy softness, pressing and wiggling to find the sensitive spots.
She groaned softly, wriggling as my finger teased her, finally breaking my gaze to throw her head back.
I sighed in pleasure as I slid my finger back out, sucking it clean once again, and eased it back inside her, loving the way she gripped the finger inside herself, her head lolling back and forth on the pillow as she shuddered, moaning with each stroke of the digit.
Those moans grew louder when I slipped a second finger into her, and began massaging the fingers along the inside her body, twisting and spreading them, then swirling them about, stirring her wet, slick pussy, giving her new pleasures, purring outright at her throaty growls of pleasure.
"God, Jessie..." She shuddered, and did what I had hoped she would do – she released my hair and raised her hands over her head to grip the headboard, opening herself to me. I ran my free hand over her breasts, my tongue still gently sliding her clit up and down until she cried out, her legs kicking slightly, her pussy fluttering and gripping the fingers still buried inside her, coating my hand with her sweetness.
She relaxed with a deep sigh, and I slid off the bed, slipping on bare feet over to my suitcase. I could feel my own wetness trickling down my leg, and my breathing was quick and light and excited, my mind blank of everything but the other thing I had planned. I knew this might be one step too far – and I had never actually done this myself, but with the opportunity in hand, I could not combat the desire.
Digging quickly into my suitcase for something tucked in amongst some nightshirts, I eased out the harness, slipping into it and turning back toward the bed, my towel now bulging out slightly with the attached toy.
Diane still lay, splayed and breathing fast, in the middle of the bed, her eyes closed, her nakedness glistening with a faint sheen of sweat, her hands still limply against the headboard. I crept back over to the bed, and dropped my towel, crawling back between her legs, but this time moving up over her. Meanwhile, my slippery hand, coated with Diane's sweet nectar, was gently stroking the toy, getting it slick and warm.
I was hurrying somewhat, knowing that I would die a little inside if Diane didn't allow this, but also knowing that, once I got this toy inside her, it was unlikely that she would complain. The first time an ex-lover had used it on me, I had nearly passed out. It was curved and ridged in all the right places, a deep lavender color, both beautiful and sensual without seeming overly male.
I mounted her, trying not to shiver at the feeling of her thighs brushing my hips, and felt the warm slippery toy brush against her.
That opened her eyes, and she looked up at me in surprise, her eyes meeting mine. She didn't seem to notice yet that I was otherwise naked like her, or notice what I was wearing.
She sighed as I paused, her eyes searching mine as she smiled weakly. "That was..." She murmured, but she broke off, biting her lip, as the head of the toy grazed her slit, and I gently rocked my hips, letting the head rub up and down very lightly.
She shivered, finally glancing down – and her eyes went as wide as they could go, her face paling slightly and her body tensing.
"It's okay," I whispered to her, "I could tell you loved it – you'll love this even more." I eased forward, the head parting her slick lips, pushing down toward her opening. I held myself up with one hand as I used the other to tilt her face back up, staring down into her eyes, wanting her to keep focused on that rather than having another woman naked on top of her.
"Jess," she murmured uncertainly.
I didn't give her the chance to over-think. My hips eased forward, and the head slid inside her.
She gasped loudly, arching up and grabbing my supporting arm with one hand in reflex. I resisted the urge to push deep, knowing that I could pleasure her with this the way the real thing could not. Instead, I swirled my hips, letting the soft, ridged toy stretch and rub her opening, even letting it pop out once or twice and re-penetrating her, remembering how that used to drive me wild.
She tried to speak several times, little broken bits of my name or wordless little cries, her breathing accelerating as I rocked the toy back and forth just inside her.
"Just say yes, Diane," I whispered, leaning down closer to her, bringing her eyes back to mine. "Just let me help," I said, reminding her, bringing her mind back to our "arrangement", a safe place for her thoughts to avoid the confusion that I knew was otherwise plaguing them. My own confusion was largely gone. I had realized how I felt when I had seen her eyes watching me pleasure her again.
She bit her lip, her back arching in little waves as her brain fought her body. "Jess..."
I slid the toy out of her and filled my free hand with one soft, round breast, squeezing just enough to get her to arch higher, my thumb swirling on the nipple, and then slid back in, letting the head of the toy glide in and out with little pumping motions of my hips.
She whimpered at the touch on her breast, and then cried out softly at my entry. "Oh, god, Jessie...yes, god, please..."
That was all I was waiting for. I reached down, gripped her hip, and pulsed my way deep inside her, moving slowly and gently, little thrusts matched by longer outward movements. Every ounce of self-control went into not burying it all at once, but even as I nudged my way deeper into Diane's body, I heard a soft, slick noise as the friction with her wetness increased. She cried out, arching up higher than ever, throwing her head back.
"Oh my god," she gasped breathlessly, and then slumped back into the bed, relaxing and reaching back up to grip the headboard, opening her legs wide. The tightness of her pussy eased slightly, and I pushed deep into her body, finally melding my hips with hers, shuddering at the stimulation of the nub of the toy teasing my own slit as I savored her long, throaty cry of pleasure.
I began long, slow, smooth strokes in and out, not really used to the hip movements but rapidly learning as I saw what made her moan, what made her gasp, and what kind of thrusts drew soft, breathy cries from Diane's throat. Her eyes were tightly closed, her head rolling around freely, her body rocking with my thrusting.
"Yes, yes," she moaned.
"Yes," I moaned back involuntarily, shuddering again at the friction against my own slick pussy. I realized too late my error – I had not gotten myself off in days, anticipating this trip, and now it was going to be all I could do to hold back. Not that it mattered. At this point, I couldn't have stopped if she had pulled out a gun and shot me.
The bed was rocking beneath us, my hips grazing the silk of her thighs. One of her hands was gripping the headboard as I worked atop her, and the other gripped the sheets of the bed in a fist, twisting and tugging at the fine linens.
I could feel sweat trickling down my back. I was gasping for breath as I pumped into Diane beneath me, my eyes drinking in the sight of her heaving, writhing form beneath me. I could feel her starting to shake, knowing she was close, and accelerated, whimpering with the effort of not coming, but I couldn't look away or distract myself – she was just too beautiful, and I had to see her.
"Oh god!" She cried. "Oh god, Jessie, don't stop, it's so good..."
I whimpered again – her using that form of my name was not helping me hold back.
"Oh...oh...oh yes...yes deeper..." Her voice kept getting higher.
I gasped as she actually started to urge me on, thrusting deeper in response. I could feel her hips jerk against mine with every impact.
"Oh! Oh, Jessie..." She writhed, crying out, obviously close, but oddly, I noticed her clench her teeth slightly. What was she doing? "Jessie, my god, my darling, please..."
I moaned, high-pitched and desperate at that new endearment, my feelings crashing in on me, and my thrusts started to become unsteady. "Diane, don't..." I gasped. My heart was racing so fast I thought it was going to explode.
Then all of my previous efforts became insufficient as I felt silky warm skin on my ass – and sank deeper into her. I missed a breath and slammed deep, writhing as I realized she had wrapped her legs around me.
"Uhhnnn!" She squealed, her hips grinding up into mine, causing bolts of electricity to shimmer up and down my spine from my clit to my brain.
Oh, god, I thought desperately, Diane has her legs around me. I can't take it...if she does that I won't be able to hold out...
My thrusts were becoming jerky as my hips twisted, trying to avoid the sweet friction that was driving me insane. I gasped as Diane's legs tightened. "God!" I whimpered. "Diane, I can't...I can't hold it if you..."
"Oh god, Jessie, please, please don't stop!" Diane cried out even louder, and her hands came up to grip my shoulders, and then my back, her body arching up like a drawn bow.
I cried out helplessly, feeling my orgasm rushing unstoppably toward me, all my long months of wanting to come with her, to come because of her, blazing in my thoughts. My hips went into overdrive, my eyes staring down at her wide blue stare, drunk on her pleasure and her beauty, her taste still on my lips, filling my brain, and the vision of her nakedness under me propelling me irrecoverably toward an orgasm that might be more than I could bear.
Then she seemed to choke up, growling low in her throat. Her hands gripped my back, and her legs tightened around me as her muscles locked, the bed frantically squeaking under us as our bodies bucked together, the wet slick sounds of the toy squirming inside her filling our ears. We moaned again and again, as if in harmony, answering each other's ecstasy – until Diane's body arched up higher still, and her body went rigid as her breathing stopped. As she did, her soft breasts brushed mine.
That was enough for me. I screamed her name, lunging against her to maximize the contact, and going into spasms that seemed to fire every nerve in my body and ever neuron in my brain, my body jerking and thrashing, my skin lit up with the heat of her under me. I could dimly hear her screaming as well, her nails digging painfully into my shoulder blades, our bodies plastered together as her legs, still tightly wrapped around my hips, jerked wildly out of control. I could even feel her pussy pulsating and quivering right up the length of the toy buried inside her. Her spasms were so strong that she carried my orgasm along with hers. I buried my face in her neck, actually sobbing with pleasure, the smell of her skin, the feel of it against my face, her own sounds in my ear elongating my orgasm far beyond my normal limits.
After several more hard spasms and short cries from her combined with gasping squeals from me, Diane finally went limp, allowing me to collapse on top of her, out of breath and with my mind totally blank.
I didn't have a clock, but I'm sure it was literally an eternity before I raised my head. Every inch of my body felt like it weighed a thousand pounds. I had never come like that. That was all I could think. Never. It wasn't me, either – it was because of her.
My arms rested on the bed on either side of her, her ribs brushing them with each deep, slow breath. Her hands were in the small of my back, soft and smooth, while her legs had slid down around my thighs.
I looked down at her face. Diane looked peaceful and dazed. Her eyes were closed, her mouth soft and just slightly open in that way of hers. Her hair was a mess around her head, fanned over the pillow and stuck to her neck and shoulders, all dewed with the sweat that glistened on us both.
Those eyes opened very slowly, dreamily, and we stared at each other from only a few inches apart. I marveled that I had ever thought those brilliant blue eyes were cold – they were so warm, so bright as she looked up at me.
I raised one lead-weight arm to brush the hair very gently back from her face, and after a moment, she did the same for me.
"Hi there," I murmured, lost in the blue of her eyes, my thoughts drifting.
"Hi," she murmured back, somewhat hoarsely.
I waited then for her to unwind her legs and arms from around me, and for things to go back the way they had before – but they didn't. Finally, thinking she must be getting uncomfortable, I started to pull away. Instantly, her legs tightened again, and her hands clutched me.
"Don't go," she whispered.
My eyes widened, staring down into hers, which I now realized were also wide and round, and surprisingly vulnerable. Suddenly, I knew what had to happen now. Taking an infinitely long minute to move, I slowly brought my lips to hers. Her lips parted immediately beneath mine, warm and soft, and for the very first time, incredibly enough, Diane and I kissed.
When our mouths finally parted – we were still short on breath, so it probably wasn't all that long a kiss – Diane sighed, still holding me close.
"Why didn't you tell me?" She asked, almost plaintively.
I stared down at her, a thousand different responses running from my head, from "well, you might have killed me" to "I wanted to, but I was afraid" and even "how the hell should I know, boss". Then I caught the sparkle in her eyes. Her loving eyes.
I couldn't help but grin. "Why didn't you tell me?"
My calm, powerful, intimidating, cold-eyed lawyer burst out in giggles. I followed suit, burying my face in her neck again as we laughed together, before I raised my head again to look into her eyes.
Then I felt very warm, soft lips trailing down my neck, and her hands sliding up my back, and I shuddered deeply. "Ohh," I moaned into her neck. "Be careful; I'm not sure I can control myself if you do that."
"Your point being?" She murmured, her hands sliding into my hair to pull my head up. Those gorgeous blue eyes were wide and warm.
"Well, I just thought I should mention it," I murmured back, nibbling her lower lip.
Her legs tightened. "Shut up and love me, Jessie," she whispered in my ear.
I drew in my breath sharply. "Only if you promise to do the same," I replied into her ear, nibbling it.
She raised my head again by the hair. "Agreed," she said, biting her lip. Her blue eyes glistened.
I could feel mine burning too. "It's a deal, then."